Mavis -Tassels & Tupperware

Such a terribly exhausting day, honestly dearest Betty can be such a hard task master at times. Although I think it’s because that Juniper creature keeps giving her such hard pokes.

I simply don’t know how the tarty one manages, or Harriet the Harlot as Betty has started to refer to her. It’s true she may be ever so slightly all fur coat and no knickers, but there’s nothing wrong with that, going without ones frillies never really bothered me. Betty can be perfectly beastly.

I remember the days in gay Paris, aah, so young, such devastating thighs, or so Madam Barrie, the experimental artist I used to do a bit of the nude stuff for, used to say. Ooh they were heady days; I used to languish in the sun, in one of my ‘special’ poses for hours until she was satisfied. I knew she’d finished when I heard the tap running, must have been to rinse the brush.

Betty was just the same at the ‘follies’, lean over there, stretch your leg this way and the other. It did become a terrible bore, especially when you only had on your tassels, at least during all this Woldstock business we can wear pants.

I know Mayor doesn’t approve, Betty says he likes ‘commando’ apparently, but that all sounds terribly strenuous, like I might have to shoot a gun or something and stick feathers in my hat.

After one of Ernest’s bed baths, in which I trialled the cream that prevents chaffing on the maypole (worked wonders on his scratchy bits) I troughed down a quick cream horn to give me the strength required for the challenges of the day. Invigorated I began to put those contortionists through their paces.

I took up position on Ernest’s recliner and asked the nice young ‘fiends’ who were floating around to pop one of their lovely ciggies into my gold, embossed with the Eiffel tower, cigarette holder. I struck a pose out of habit more than anything else and we were in business.

The lovely little ciggie had a whiff of the woldstock wiltonberry about it with just a slight soupcon of garlic, which of course took me right back to 1939, although I did remember to keep my vest on today.

Darling Harlot joined me and I proceeded to teach her some poses. I must remember to pop my spare tassels in a Tupperware pot for her to practice with…